Friday, September 17, 2004

Sometimes you wonder about why people stay married

You may remember the post I did on joint accounts and why they can be a problem. Here is a call that is the exact opposite.

The banker informs me that a customer is demanding to speak to a supervisor. The customer is furious because the banker will not release information on an overdraft protection account. She is insistent that she is a signer on this account. I take the call from the banker and introduce myself. The customer, Ms. Swears With Wolves (SWW), immediately begins to start screaming at me.

SWW: You're stupid! Stupid ass! B*tch! Sl*t! Why can't you just give me this information? Why? I hate your f*cking bank! Hate it!
DM: I'd like to be able to assist you. My understanding is that you're looking for information on an overdraft protection account. Is that correct?
SWW: Yes! You f*cking b*tch! Give me the information!
DM: Unfortunately, I am not showing that you are a signer on this account.
SWW: I am! You're lying, you b*tch!
DM: No, Ms. Wolves, what I'm showing is that you are a signer on the checking account. However, the account listed as overdraft protection is not in your name. Therefore, while I can certainly speak to you about the transactions in the checking account, I cannot discuss the overdraft protection account with you.
SWW: F*ck you!
DM: Ms. Wolves, if you would like me to assist you, I would appreciate it if you please stop using profanity.
SWW: Fine.
DM: Now, as I was saying, you are not appearing as a signer on the overdraft protection account. However, I am showing that there is a joint signer on the checking account with you. I would suggest that you ask the joint signer to call and we would be happy to discuss the op account with them.

This sets her off on how she is his wife and how dare I tell her she's not a signer on the op account, she knows perfectly well that she is a signer and I'm just a f*cking c*nt faced b*tch.

DM: Ms. Wolves, I have already warned you about the profanity. If the other account holder is present, I would be happy to talk to him. If he is not, I suggest you have him call back and ask his questions then.
SWW: He's here now.

The phone is handed off. I need to identify the joint signer so I ask him his name (Lives in Hell (LH)) and for some other pieces of identification. SWW is in the background, screaming at the top of her lungs about what a b*tch I am.

DM: Thank you for this information. As I was explaining to your wife, I show that, while you are both on the checking account, only your name is listed on the op account. I would be happy to discuss the information with you.
LH: Okay. What was my last payment?
DM: $25.00.
LH: Okay. Thank you.
DM: If you are interested in having your wife as a signer on the op account, you may want to look into reapplying for the account, since this is a credit account. Unfortunately, since she is not a signer, we can not release information to her.
LH: Okay.
DM: Was there anything else I could assist you with?
SWW (in the background): Give me that phone! Give it to me! I want to talk to that b*tch!
LH: No.
DM: Thank you for calling, I'm glad I was able to help you tonight.
LH: Yeah. Thanks. Shut up, you stupid b*tch! They can't talk to you about it!

I'm assuming the last comments were addressed to SWW since the call disconnected.

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