Technology and Random Peter Pan

DM has mentioned that we take escalated calls at a large banking call center.  Customers are more amusing than any stand-up comic.  In fact, I encourage customer service representatives to go into stand-up comedy for the amusement of the world.  People must know these crazy things.
 
People in general are stupid.  I'm not saying every person is stupid, just in general, people are stupid.  There are ways to hide the moronic things we do, but unfortunately, some people don't have this built into their genetic make-up.  This is good, because it makes for a fun story.
 
Not too long ago, a customer said to me, and I quote, "I didn't fall off the apple tree yesterday.  I'm hip."  Now, this doesn't make sense to me.  Besides the fact that people don't usually fall off of apple trees, I'm pretty sure there is no hip hop songs with the lyrics, "I was climbing on the apple tree, I didn't fall off you see."  I wanted to explain that if she is using the phrase, "I didn't fall off the apple tree yesterday," this automatically disqualifies her from being hip.
 
One of the best examples of a moronic moment I've come across is from about two and a half years ago.  I will remember this woman for the rest of my life. 
 
Side note: Oh my God, there's a grown man dressed up as Peter Pan on T.V. because he dresses like this everyday of his life.  I'm so unbelievably scared.  Conan O'Brien finds the strangest guests.  This guy brought pictures of himself in many different fairy outfits.  He just said he's single and straight and loves the ladies.  He called his outfit the glitter star fairy.  Conan just asked him what he wears for Halloween.  He has problems for Halloween.  He's 50 years old.  But he said he's 5.  He's been dressing like this for over 20 years.  And now he's making Conan wear his hat.  He has a website.  www.pixyland.org  This is what they said on Conan and I searched.  The site won't load right now but I'm pretty sure of the address.  I'm scared.
 
This is about how the call at NABABNA went:
 
B (Me): Thank you for holding.  My name is Beth and I'm a supervisor.  How can I help you?
C (Customer): I want you to tell me right now who's been calling me and make them stop.
B:  I'd be happy to help you as much as I can, you said someone has been calling you?  Are they from NABABNA?
C: Well, yes.  (She scoffs at me.)
B:  Did they leave a message?
C:  I want them to stop calling me.
B:  Okay, have you talked to them?
C:  No.
B:  Do you have the name or department of who's calling you?
C: No.  Make them stop.  Figure out who they are right now!
B:  I'm trying to help you.  I don't have any comments or notations of anyone calling you.  I'll need some help from you.
C:  I mean it.  They need to stop. 
B:  I understand that.  Have they left messages?  (I try asking again.)
C:  No. 
B:  So you haven't talked to anyone and they're not leaving messages.  Are you finding our number on your Caller ID?
C:  No.  Make them stop.
B:  You've said that.  I want to help you.
 
Okay, so after 28 minutes of going back and forth of who is calling you, how do you know they are calling you, and her yelling (getting more and more frustrated and louder), she finally says:
C:  Stop calling me.  Every time I push redial, it calls you people!
I hit the mute button so fast and bust out laughing.  I composed myself quickly and stated to the customer:
B:  Um, ma'am, redial calls the person you called last, not who called you.
There is a pause. 
 
It's a long pause.
 
C:  Oh!  I just don't get this whole technology thing!  I'm just a blonde. 
 
Here's the thing.  Redial is not technology.  It hasn't been for what, 20 years? 
 
Again, I say, people are stupid.